This week was admittedly harder than the previous. The kids seemed louder, the mornings seemed earlier, and the energy and patience needed to deal with everything a room full of toddlers can thrown at you was slower in coming. In short I found this week to be difficult.
Also compared to last week week I missed going to work more. Don't get me wrong I am enjoying being home, but it has been tough not working. I find myself day dreaming about projects I want to start, or things that need my attention.
However something hit me this week that I didn't expect. I felt very left out and very out of the loop. I found myself frustrated as I read e-mails or browsed meeting minutes. I wanted to be there, I wanted to participate. I didn't want to be on the outside looking in I wanted to be right in the middle of it all.
I felt sidelined. And I felt that way for good reason, I am on the sidelines. I am a beached player. The odd thing is I drew the lines, and I volunteered to sit out.
This leave of absence was my idea after all.
Of course it hasn't been all bad. This week also had a lot of fun, excitement and joy. Here are two highlights.
First Ariella has decided that she likes to be rocked to sleep. This means a few times this week her and I have journeyed to the rocking chair in her room and we creaked back and forth as I shhhh'ed away her tears helping her to she fall asleep.
Of course rocking is soothing for me to, and one night we both drifted off together. Sometime later I woke up unsure of what time it was, and unsure if I should try to get up. Both of my arms had fallen asleep.Part of me wanted to stay there and fall back asleep, part of me wanted to get to bed to fall asleep, and two parts of me wanted to put Ariella down so they could wake up.
So I gathered what little strength I had and trusted that I was in fact holding her tightly. We braved the dangerous trek from her room to mine with out any issue. And it turned out that we were only out of the room for an hour.
A comfy hour never the less.
Second I got to play model again! Prior to the Christmas that just passed our then family of three decided to have photos done by Laura over at O La La! Photography. They turned out fantastic! You can see us on her website.
This time around Meghan wanted to have some new born/family pictures taken. This past Saturday morning Laura came over to do a photo shoot with us (once she did some of our house work anyway). It was a lot of fun, and a little dangerous. You've got to be careful where you point a naked new born. Meghan was peed on, and I got the poo. Oh well shirts wash.
The pictures should arrive shortly but she has provided a teaser on her Facebook page. Needless to say I am excited.
So if I had to wrap up this week in a few words what would I say? This was an exhausting week, physically and emotionally. However no matter how many dark clouds loomed I was never without a silver lining.
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2 comments:
Awww you are an awesome father. But like all of us who choose to stay home the world keeps turning without us and we do feel left out whether. And besides being an awesome Dad you have the joy of having the best kids in this generation.
I love reading these blogs Christopher.... I teared up at the rocking Ariella to sleep part. This time at home will go so fast and you will be back at work before you know it and wishing you were home. You two are so lucky to have this opportunity to spend this time with your cute lil munchkins... cherish it 'cause they grow so darn fast :))
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